Although rough, ready and certainly extreme, I am offering him his place at the Veggie Dinner Table for being in my all-time-favourite Western (She Wore a Yellow Ribbon) and, more than anything, for this spectacular quote:
“Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway.”
Wayne, born Marion Morrison as everyone knows, was often known simply as 'The Duke'. His career took off with his portrayal of The Ringo Kid in Stagecoach (1939) and 83 of his movies were cowboy films. Therefore, in keeping with the good and honest tradition he embraces and personifies, I will be serving my Vegetarian Cowboy Pie. COWBOY PIE
Ingredients 6 medium potatoes (about 800g), peeled and cut into two-bite-size pieces 6 vegetarian sausages (defrosted if frozen) 1 red onion, half chopped and half sliced. 2 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed 1 and a half large tin beans baked beans (or 3 small) 2tsp chilli powder salt and black pepper 75g/ 3oz cheese, grated 1 tbsp olive oil 25g/ 1oz butter 25ml/ 1fl oz milk Method
Heat the oil in a pan and add fry the sausage until browned. Remove from heat and chop into slices (about 3 per sausage). Use the same oil to gently fry the onion until soft and then add the garlic. Add the chilli powder and stir well until everything is coated. Mix in the beans and replace the sausages. Heat until the whole mixture is almost boiling. Adjust chilli heat if you want to and season to taste. Then turn off the heat. Meanwhile, place the potatoes in a pan of hot water and boil for about 10-12 minutes until soft. Then drain and allow to steam for a few minutes. Return to the pan. Add the butter and milk and season well. Mash. A normal 'masher' is fine. It doesn't have to be silky smooth but you don't want any lumps. Place sausage mixture in a large bowl. Spread the mashed potato over the top and use a fork to score. Place on a baking tray (to make it easier later to remove from the oven and to catch any drips). If you wish, you can now cover this and keep until ready to cook. Grate the cheese for later. When you are ready, heat the oven to Gas 7/ 200C. Bake for about 20 mins. Sprinkle cheese over the top of the potato, return to the oven and cook for a further 10 to 15 minutes until cheese bubbles.
Laurence Harvey (or Zhi Mosheh Skikne – who would have guessed he was really Lithuaninan?) was best known for Room at the Top, The Manchurian Candidate and The Alamo.Watching him in the latter, I was inspired to consider him for a place at my table. As William B Travis, he led the small force which kept Santa Anna’s army at bay for just long enough.
With facts few and far between, the myth of how Travers, Crockett and Bowie gave their lives for Texas is a great story.
Tex-Mex food is always a favourite and would be an appropriate choice of menu, even if only to stir up a lively conversation. VEGGIE ENCHILADAS
Ingredients 350g quorn mince 1 onion, peeled and chopped 2 garlic cloves, peeled and crushed 1 red pepper, de-seeded and chopped 1 jalapeno pepper, de-seeded and chopped 2tsp chilli powder 1 tin chopped tomatoes 1 tin kidney beans 2tbsp tomato ketchup 6 soft tortillas 100g grated cheese 2 tbsp olive oil coarsely ground black pepper and salt to season Method
Heat oil in a large pan and fry onion and pepper gently until softened.
Then add the jalapeno and garlic and cook for a couple of minutes more.
Sprinkle in the chilli powder and make sure that all the ingredients are coated.
Add the tomatoes, then add the quorn (straight from frozen is fine). Fill the tomato tin half full of water and pour over the top of the quorn. Rinse the kidney beans and add them. Season and stir well. Bring to boil, then reduce. Simmer for about 20 minutes so that sauce thickens.
Put filling in centre of each tortilla.
Fold over like a parcel and place side by side in dish. You may need to squish them down a bit to make them fit.
Mix 2tbsp ketchup with 100ml hot water. Pour this over the top of the folded tortillas. Sprinkle with grated cheese and chopped herbs. Cover with foil. You can now leave this for as long as you like. When you are ready, place in the oven at Gas 7/ 220C for about 20 mins. While it is cooking, you may like to make a mixed leaf salad.
Remove foil and place back in oven for about 10 - 15 mins or until the cheese bubbles. Top should be slightly crispy.
Edward G Robinson, originally Emmanuel Goldenberg from Romania, became famous for playing the tough guy in the early gangster films.
Although apparently, quiet
and sensitive in real life, he could command a menacing screen presence, never
more so than in the fabulous ‘Little Caesar’ one of my favourite films of all
time.
The New York
restaurants the wise guys frequented in the early gangster films seemed to
serve nothing but Spaghetti Bolognese. So if Eddie came to dinner, I would
like him to feel at home.
This is a very
quick and easy recipe. I even cheat by using ketchup instead of tomato puree. It
may not be for purists but I have never had any complaints when I have served
it.
VEGGIE SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE
Serves 2 – 3 Ingredients
300g/10½oz quorn mince, frozen
15ml/1tbsp olive oil
1 onion, peeled and chopped 2 garlic cloves, peeled and crushed 2 fresh tomatoes, chopped
7floz/ 200ml warm water from the kettle
1 large can chopped tomatoes
30ml/2tbsp tomato ketchup
10ml/ 2tsp dried mixed herbs or a handful of fresh (even better)
10ml/ 2tsp vegetarian gravy granules
100g spaghetti Method
Heat oil in a large pan. Fry onion until almost soft. Then add garlic and cook for a couple more minutes until both are golden but not burnt.
Stir in the chopped tomatoes. Then add the quorn mince, just as it is so that it sits on the top.
Put 2 tbsp tomato ketchup into the empty tomato tin and fill almost to the top with warm water from the kettle. (Don't use boiling water as you will burn your hands when you touch the tin.)
Give a quick stir and then pour over the top of the mince which will help it to defrost and break down. Add the gravy granules and stir Turn up the heat a bit until it all bubbles, then reduce to a simmer.
Chop the herbs finely. Add the herbs to the pan with the fresh tomato and season.
Allow to simmer
for at least 10 minutes. I usually make this well in advance and allow it to sit for a bit to absorb the flavours. (But if I'm in a rush, 10 minutes is fine.) When ready to serve
Cook spaghetti according to instructions, in a
pan of salted boiling water. Make sure the bolognese is piping hot.
Place spaghetti around the edge of the plate
and serve the bolognese inside it.
Sprinkle with cheese or basil leaves if you
wish.
Either sprinkle over some finely grated hard cheese like Parmesan (vegetarian versions are available) or roughly grate some cheddar.
I love the scene in Dirty
Harry where Harry Callahan mops up a bank robbery with a hot dog in hand; the
first time he utters the immortal phrase,“I know what you’re thinking…”
So, if Harry came to dinner, we would have hot dogs (and then maybe, intimidate some ‘punks’). Now, I know what you're thinking: how can hot dogs make a suitable 'dinner'? My answer would be that Harry wouldn't care about folded napkins or scented candles. He would love a woman who could put a tasty snack on the table with a bottle of squeezy mustard and a beer. HOT DOGS AND ONIONS Important Point:
There are several options for the vegetarian hot dog sausages: 1 - using vegetarian hot dog sausages (usually in the supermarket frozen cabinet) 2 - using sausages made from a meat substitute such as Quorn 3 - using vegetable sausages made from e.g carrots/ peas I would not suggest using the ones made from vegetables as they tend to be quite crumbly. Vegetable protein or Quorn makes a more realistic sausage for this iconic American snack. I have, therefore, made it two ways. (Remember that this is an 'indoor' dish. Hot dogs on an outdoor barbecue are something else entirely and usually make you end up with black teeth.)
Serves 2 - 4 depending on how hungry you are/ who is eating with you. Ingredients 4 hot dog rolls 4 sausages - use either frozen vegetarian hot dog sausages (which look like frankfurters) or Quorn sausages 3 medium onions (red or white depending upon your preference), peeled and chopped roughly, or sliced thinly 2tbsp oil (possibly 3tbsp - see below) 2tbsp vinegar (I usually use balsamic or red wine vinegar but malt vinegar will do) 2tbsp sugar (caster sugar works best with white/onions; brown is best with red onions) Method
First start the onions The longer you allow for these to cook, the better they will be. Heat 2tbsp oil in a pan and add onions. Allow to soften and then add the sugar. Stir until all are covered. Pour in half of the vinegar.
Turn the heat right down until it looks as though it has almost gone off. Keep an eye and stir at regular intervals. When all the first half of vinegar has been absorbed, add the rest. Keep turning gently until they are soft and sweet. Cook the sausages If using hot dog sausages, put them in a pan of boiling water and heat for about 3 minutes. If using Quorn sausages, defrost if frozen. Heat 1tbsp oil and then fry sausages until browned on all sides. Prepare the rolls
This is usually just a case of splitting them down the middle. Some people will put spread on them but it really isn't necessary. Assemble
The trick is to have everything ready at the same time so you can put it all together in a hurry.
Open up a roll, place a sausage in the middle and cover with onions. Serve with ketchup and/ or squeezy mustard.
Ruth Gordon (1896 – 1985)
was an American actress whose voice was almost as recognisable as her face. She began performing as a beautiful 19 year old, but is best known for her roles in later life, such as her scene-stealing part in Rosemary’s Baby.
She appeared in the 1977 Columbo episode Try and Catch Me, playing a famous crime novelist who thinks that she has the skills at her fingertips to outwit The Lieutenant.
(A note on terms used: I
have kept with zucchini, rather than
the usual courgette of English
cooking because it felt rude to alter the title of the dish. Similarly, I have
retained omelet, although we would
more often see it in a menu today as omelette.)
As with the other Columbo
recipes, which may have been written many years ago, I have adapted the ingredients list
slightly so as to make it more representative of the items you would put on
your shopping list now.
I have also made the
method more comprehensive in case not everyone knows how to cook “as for omelet”,
a charming and optimistic assumption made by Ruth.
The recipe said it served
2 and included 4 eggs, so rather than making one huge omelet and then cutting it
in half, I decided – as the cooking process is speedy anyway – to split the
ingredients and cook twice.
Ruth doesn’t specify why
she uses so much butter. Jenny suggested halving the amount. I think 10g is
suitable for a single omelet but because I made two (see above) I adjusted
the ingredients list in line with this and changed it to 20g.
I started the cooking
process with the peppers as they need a little longer than the other
ingredients.
Another change I made was
in grating the zucchini. It allowed me to add texture and also to remove some
of the moisture before cooking.
I also seasoned the beaten
eggs rather than waiting until the end.
Ingredients
Serves 2
20g butter
1 medium zucchini (courgette)
(makes about 150g or 1 cup when grated)
½ medium onion (makes about 50g
or 3 tbsp when chopped)
½ medium green pepper (makes about about
50g or 3tbsp when chopped)
1 large stalk celery (makes about
40g or 3tbsp when chopped)
4 free range eggs
Cooking
Prepare the ingredients
Grate the zucchini. Place
above a bowl in a piece of absorbent kitchen roll or a tea towel. Wring this
out until you have removed as much water from the zucchini as you can.
Peel and dice the onion. Finely chop the celery.
Wash, dry and dice the
green pepper.
Crack 2 eggs into a dish
and beat well. Season with salt and pepper. Then repeat for the other 2 in a
separate bowl.
Make the Omelets
Warm two plates
Melt 10g of the butter in
a shallow pan until it bubbles.
Add the half the pepper
and sauté for a
few minutes. Then add half of each of the zucchini, onion, pepper and celery and
continue to sauté until
tender.
Add 2 of the beaten eggs
and move the pan around to ensure they cover evenly. As the eggs begin to set,
push cooked parts into the centre and allow any liquid to run to the edges
until all is set.
Allow it to just slightly brown on the bottom.
Fold in half and slide
onto a warmed plate.
Repeat with the rest of
the ingredients.
Serving
How you eat this will very
much depend upon when you eat it.
Although you could have it
on its own, it would make an excellent lunch with a light salad. Or it can be
part of a more substantial dinner.
The Verdict
Because I kept as close as
I could to the original amounts when preparing the ingredients, I found that I used
half a pepper and onion. This is not a problem; I just put the rest in the
fridge ready to join the salad for tomorrow’s lunch. It did strike me, however,
that that it would be so easy to make four omelets by doubling the amounts and
using up all the veg. Because there was such a lot of filling, I would also be inclined to make each omelet with three, rather than two, eggs.
The Experience
As stated above, this is
very versatile and can make a lovely lunch.
We, however, had it for an
evening meal. Dave persuaded me that oven chips and baked beans were ‘the way
forward’ so this is how we ate our omelets, with the requisite episode on the
television and trays on our laps. And yes, it was a lovely evening!
Autobiographical Footnote:
After agreeing to test this one, I noticed the inclusion of celery. I have had
a chequered relationship with celery. The truth is that I lived on it for about
a week when I was in my teens and wanted to fit into some particularly clingy
jeans. My Mum had told me that they looked a bit ‘clipped’ which is a lovely
euphemism for “Yes it does!” so, hearing that the process of eating celery
actually burned up its own calorie content, I made it the sole ingredient of every meal every day for a week. I wore and felt comfortable in the jeans, but I
have not been able to enjoy celery since. I never buy it and only eat it if it
is a ‘hidden ingredient’ in a meal. This left me with a dilemma: should it stay
or should it go? Reader, I cooked with it. Never let anyone say that cooking is
not a cathartic experience.
2 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed
Use the same oil to gently fry the onion until soft and then add the garlic. Add the chilli powder and stir well until everything is coated.
Meanwhile, place the potatoes in a pan of hot water and boil for about 10-12
Spread the mashed potato over the top and use a fork to score. Place on a baking tray (to make it easier later to remove from the oven and to catch any drips).
